Hello yes this is birb

azzandra:
“ bidyke:
“ alex-fulcrum:
“ shadowfire125:
“ i’m having an existential crisis
”
I am so sorry, but this is actually probably true. Plants co evolved to reward us for cultivating and propagating them. It’s called exorphin theory, and plants...

azzandra:

bidyke:

alex-fulcrum:

shadowfire125:

i’m having an existential crisis

I am so sorry, but this is actually probably true. Plants co evolved to reward us for cultivating and propagating them. It’s called exorphin theory, and plants are pretty much just using us as their means of reproduction. That’s why humans show nearly every sign of species domestication. Have a good night, friend.

Trees are superior and I completely accept this.

I, for one, welcome our arboreal overlords.

steelpandas:

me: *pouring 2% into steaming pitcher*
customer: EXCUSE ME WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING I WANTED NONFAT
me: *looks at the 15 drinks on the bar* did you get a green tea latte?
customer: ..no…
me: THEN THIS ISNT YOUR DRINK

milkbarista:
“ rebirth (we are all made of stars)
”

milkbarista:

rebirth (we are all made of stars)

dailyactress:
“Chloe Moretz and Sasha Lane Leaves Greenwich Hotel in New York
”

dailyactress:

Chloe Moretz and Sasha Lane Leaves Greenwich Hotel in New York 

medallionstallion:

One act of kindness can change your whole life.

loneozner:

what is like…. the Point

blazikendall:
“ Little gamecubes resting in their natural habitat
”

blazikendall:

Little gamecubes resting in their natural habitat

Yo bitches I’m back lmao

mando-gunslinger:

priceofliberty:

wild-blake-hickok:

priceofliberty:

wrecknician:

That sperm switch got me fucked up like where is it?? What if you accidentally turn it on during sex and unleash the hounds

Color code the switches.

Red to nut it up, green to slut it up

That’s cool but I don’t trust a switch. Give me an app to control it.

And risk exposure to hackers jacking your nut control?

I’M IN

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Originally posted by blackhatmovie

snakemetal:
“ chipsprites:
“ thank you
” ”
pastel-crow:
“ me
”

kyonsama:

kyonsama:

kyonsama:

From now on i’ll only accept anon hate in morse code

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You better watch your fucking tone or i’m calling the cops

totalhunk:

i hate imagine dragons, and i hate that song that’s like “woooohooohooohoooo gonna be best day ov ma lyyyfe ly y y y y y yfe” and whichever band does that one and i hate bastille, and i hate the 1975